Bullying at a deeper level


Reader request. Interesting read, imo.

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Article: Mothers and their children find themselves 'bullied' out of peer groups... the power of Gangnam 'pig mothers'

Source: Money Today via Nate

The mother of a son heading into sixth grade is feeling pretty distressed as his winter break begins. She's recently found out that the mothers of a peer group she used to be a part of in fifth grade have left her behind to create another group. Not only that, but they have all sent their kids to another famous after school academy for the winter break without telling her.

She hasn't been able to hold her head up ever since her son's grades began rapidly dropping. She used to lead the group when he was in the fourth grade but after his class rank started dropping in fifth grade, so did her position in the group.

Although his grades still average out at 92, she's now excluded from the KakaoTalk room the mothers share. As a last resort, she searches to join another mother's group from another school but they're not accepting of her so easily.

It's an unfortunate reality where the 'levels' of mothers are now being divided according to the grades of their children. The phenomenon is spreading among elementary schools in Seoul and Gangnam, and mothers are at the edges of their seats whenever it's time for midterm and final grades to come out.

Mothers whose children are at the top of their classes and can afford to send them to the most famous after school academies are now being called 'pig mothers', and are often seen as the holders of powers within their respective groups. 'Pig mothers' usually hold positions in parent-teacher organizations and form groups for the most famous after school programs.

After sending their kids off to school, the mothers get together at a cafe and share information on not only after school academies and teachers, but specific parents who don't seem like they're paying much attention to their children's education and children who are ranked at the bottom of the class.

One elementary school teacher revealed, "Whenever a new school year begins, I often receive calls from parents requesting that their children not be put in the same class as a child who they have deemed to be bothersome to their child's education."

Once your child's grades begin dropping, so does your position in the pig mother's group. Rumors about your kid dropping even one point in rank will spread rapidly among the mothers and you'll find yourself eventually bullied out of the group.

Elementary school student Kim who attends a famous after school academy for gifted students revealed, "A new group was formed over this break and some of my friends who couldn't keep up had to quit. My mom told me not to become close with kids who don't study."

Working mother Lee added, "I messaged a few mothers around me to ask for some information on preparing my kid for junior high and they all ignored me. I don't know what to do. I should've kept up with these mothers beforehand."

A psychology professor at Seoul University explained, "The reason mothers obsess over their children's grades is because of their desire to become associated with a top position. There's a need to change society's assumption that you can only live a successful and happy life if you study well."

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1. [+1,823, -25] So pathetic... What do you expect the kids to learn. No wonder the country is in the state it is now...

2. [+1,834, -38] I bet all you ajummas alienate the other ajummas who don't have hundreds of thousands in the bank too

3. [+112, -7] Obviously trying to live vicariously through their children since they sucked at studying themselves ㅋㅋㅋㅋ

4. [+101, -15] (TN: This example is used a lot to criticize the way Korean society views education compared to other countries) The difference in reactions upon seeing a janitor sweeping the streets:
Vietnamese Mother: It's because of people like them that we're able to live in a clean place!
Korean Mother: You're going to end up like him if you don't study!

5. [+82, -1] Why don't these mothers know that kids learn and pick up more things from seeing their mother live a hard working and fruitful life instead of forcing so many things onto them? These children will only grow up to be more and more independent on their parents, like kangaroo babies..

6. [+69, -1] They want to brag about their smart child, brag that they're the parent of a successful child.. Don't ever say this is for your children. It's to fulfill your own greed.

7. [+55, -1] Reminds me of that incident... when a child asked her mother, "Mom, there's a bullied kid in my class, what should I do?" and the mother told her, "Don't hang out with her ever in case her misfortune comes to you." And then that kid commit suicide.

8. [+44, -1] They won't learn until their own kid is bullied. All they're giving their kid is stress. What a dirty world where our level as a human being is divided according to class points.

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